a journal of...

A journal among friends...
art, words, home, people and places

Monday, May 27, 2019

An old country

This morning, walking in the growing heat on the neighborhood paths around my new apartment, there was so little breeze that I kept crossing the streets trying to keep to leafy shade.  Paths, roadways, sidewalks all were easy enough to traverse, being mostly newly paved and marked, and for a Sunday morning pretty free of competing vehicles.

Not so in the Habana Vieja, or Vedado, or Habana Centro, the capitol of a country so much older than the U.S. in history and in state of mind, where the streets were cobbled, pitted, crushed or uprooted, and cars, motorcycles, bikes and taxis...even horse-drawn carriages...take the corners of the narrow lanes by sheer bulk, powered by a good deal of machismo.  Fortunately, wherever I walked during those days in the city...and I managed those streets pretty far each day, as much as eleven or twelve kilometers morning to evening...I went as the sphinx predicted for my time of life, three-legged.  I'd been wise enough to carry a cane with  me to Cuba, just in case, since my balance isn't the best these days.  In my way, I am sort of old, too.

Describing the state of the streets seems an odd, not to say ungrateful, way to begin writing about travels to a country I can only describe as spectacular.  Trying to write these posts, I find myself still reeling from it, hardly knowing where to begin; there is just so much, so wide, so deep, and all tangled in the sorts of tangents it is too easy to follow...as, no doubt, you will see as you read these.  I pity you readers, but plow ahead...


But I think the first thing to lay down in any story about Cuba is how old the country is, and how its age defines it.  Those streets, and the buildings which route their ways, exude the 500 years of its formal history.  Here, say the western conquerors, is the spot of origin of Havana in 1519, marked by the Templete; this year is its half-millennial celebration.



Most tourists see these carefully recomposed manifestations of that in the government and private buildings around the plazas.



But for most of the city its ruins and their periodic, sometimes fitful, renovations mark quite authentically the years between its first recorded settlement and the invading countries which left their insignia of conquest and monument over the centuries.  The years, too, leave their half-millenial guideposts for us to ponder.



Some, like the San Francisco church door below, center themselves in view, their height testament to the power they can still instill.  (The larger your door, the more prestige...)


Others, as in the streets in the neighborhood where I stayed, also nearly half a millennium old, lie quietly behind, easily passed by and yet equally full of the history of the more ordinary.



And there is the history standing in the natural world, too, like the ceiba tree, the tree of Mayan myth, and Cuban tradition, the tree under which you are safe from lightning, unlike the haughty Royal Palm, which sends its stalk into the sky to attract Zeus' bolts.  But that's another story.


You see?  I am getting ahead of myself.  I should be starting at the beginning of my journey, and yet, as I look back on it, there seems to be no beginning, except for the simplest of points:  the plane from Miami setting down at the gate, and I barely remember that except for the remnants of my gate pass.  And then, chronology disintegrating, I am immediately awash in Cuba.

Still, there is a sort of beginning.  When I arrived at the airport just outside La Habana, coming through the lines of custom with little remarkable obstruction, I was at first too busy looking around for my ride to notice the landscape beyond the bright yellow concrete walls.  But it wasn't long before I saw my name on his placard, and a cheerful fellow hustled me and my luggage outside, instructing me to wait by the curb while he went back for his taxi "200 meters off".  I offered to walk with him, but he waved that idea away; it was clear he had his orders to take care of la dama...a name to which I was referred, I slowly realized over the days, by nearly all the Cubanos I came to meet.  A woman of my age, traveling alone in Cuba, appears to be something of a novelty, at least nominally; there were certainly plenty of women travelers on their own, but only one brandishing a wooden cane with a mule's head on it.  That and a pink hat with a rolled brim identified me from the first day as I found my way around the place I'd been wanting to see again for a long time.




My ride into the sprawling city of Havana, however, was out of a picture postcard.  My driver, sent by my hostesses, arrived in a shiny green and white 51 Buick, with a Mercedes engine and a Chevrolet steering wheel and who knows what else for the rest of its parts.  Born and bred in the capitol, he talked proudly about all the work he had done on this and other old cars; he was a mechanic, he said, and loved working on them.  He also turned out to be an excellent introduction to Cuba modern.

As we drove through the heated breeze barely moving dry fields, unfattened cows grazing at the edges of mango orchards just beginning to ripen their luscious fruit, the beginnings of low white-washed buildings, homes as well as businesses, with blue or rust-red roofs missing pieces, he pointed out this business or that farm, those changes or that ancient edifice.  These gave way to uniformed civil servants or students waiting for buses to school or the city, workers with tools at hand, machines swelling the dust.  Then as we neared the city, a long trail of pipes waiting in the center aisle of the road for burial...new water and sewer systems, long overdue, coming to save the city from its antiquated flow.

We drove past the old fort, the highest point in the city, now the police station, and maneuvering more than one turnabout we turned off the main highway and into the maze of city streets, none more than a car wide and swarming with people, bicycles, trucks, carts and the open doorways of houses, in the front rooms of which many made a small market or restaurant, where women with shopping bags and men fixing cars or unloading bags of concrete from pushcarts clustered. 



We weren't to the main center of Habana Vieja yet, where the tour buses and cruise ships unload...our destination was the southern residential section, a few blocks from the Bay where the old cranes and train terminal (also under renovation) lay.


This would be my neighborhood...what my hosts and my guides and all the people I had yet to meet would, smiling, call The Real Habana.



The house with Blue Doors on the corner of Merced and Habana Streets is an Airbnb that had been recommended by Cathy's son and daughter-in-law from their visit a few years ago; they had been there on an international run.  Nice people, Stephanie told me, and helpful.  My small luggage, driver and I climbed the marble stairs to the second floor where Barbara and Maidy, hosts, welcomed me, paid the driver, and introduced Maidy's parents Nilda and Guelo, who would stay with me while my real hosts went off to well-deserved travel to Spain and perhaps Italy.  They hoped.


 It seemed that the two women had won a free trip, which, in the language of Cuban living, depended on them getting an airline seat standby.  I will shorten the suspense we all went through day after day by saying that it took six days of going back and forth to the airport before they acquired those seats (during which time the afternoon flight had been suspended), and so, it turned out, I got to see and benefit from their good advice and friendly hospitality for most of my stay.  Nilda and Guela were the sweet topping who opened maps, decoded my pathetic Spanish, held conversations with me in the evenings about life and history in Cuba, made me tea and mangoes for my airline cold, and shared their daughter-in-law's book on the continuing evolution of Cuban socialism, which I read for the week, growing more and more interested in its implications not only for Cuba but also for its echoes in other parts of the world.



Guelo being a retired history professor and Nilda being a beautician, they had traveled some outside the country and had lived through most of the revolution.  Their son's family, in California, included a seven year old granddaughter.  To live, they preferred the places beyond the city to the noisy streets of the old capitol.  There was a lot to say on both our sides.  I could hardly have landed in a more propitious spot in La Habana.


After I had changed money (the Cuban convertible peso, which outsiders use and citizens mostly don't, isn't available for exchange outside Cuba), and figured out which key opened which door and which way each worked, I took a map of the old town which Barbara had marked for me and set out on my three feet for the ten blocks north that would take me to the Plaza Vieja and beyond.



The streets between were a marvel in themselves. Cobblestones with pitted corners and loose bricks paved the way.  Buildings crumbled beside me and buildings straightened themselves into their old, renewed configurations.  Like Barbara and Maidy's house, they are centuries old.  Nothing in La Habana Vieja, however, appears to be torn down these days...instead, the goal of all that rebuilding seems to elevate the old to its former glory.


Mostly Spanish in origin, the structures are drawn around a central open space which in houses is most immediately surrounded by the kitchens and washrooms, with clothes and sheets hanging over the balconies.


In the public buildings are atria with beautiful, often peaceful gardens of  tropical flowers, one or two benches for sitting out of the fray of the street, and small sculptures or painted murals.



The windows open by old louvres and wooden shutters to balconies which let the breezes from the Bay flow through.

The past is our foundation, they say, and we make it the foundation for our future.  Houses, hotels, offices and museums were on their way to a restoration of their old dignity to give new life to a new generation.  No matter how long it takes.  It is a city whose beauty emanates from within its structures and its history, and the vision of its future is as spectacular as its past.


That it is also a country with a difficult economy, not to mention contrary neighbors, and workers with advanced degrees that hold two or three jobs to keep a family, is also visible.   Its population of 22 million, like its edifices, are nonetheless raising themselves on the same principle.  It takes money, of course, so the neighborhoods outside the more traveled sections may work harder, longer at it.  But they do, however they can.  More important, they appear to have the architectural skill to do it.

Leysis Quesada vera, Princess of Los Sitios

In the posts that follow, you will see La Habana as I saw, heard, tasted and absorbed it, one story at a time, sometimes from my journals there, sometimes from this distance of time and space and dischronology.   The art I went to see, the point of my journey, the theme of my official intended purpose, dominated the mind I brought to the city, and the images I took away from it.  But Havana itself is the art.  There is art in the very fabric of their lives.  The art they make begins from that point.  The photograph above, one of a series I hope to show you more of, is the Cuba I see.  It is the story I want, more than this messy introduction, to tell you.








Wednesday, May 1, 2019

The view from here

Birds and the sleepy drone of morning traffic...that's what I hear from my balcony early, my cup at hand, a pen in hand, intended to make the list for the day, but itching to write to you instead.  So I do.  How could I not...looking out at the leafy canopy, the air still cool, the sky a lightly veiled blue, a new morning ritual begun with pleasure.



It's going to be a hot day, but just now the slight chill refreshes, even after the first full night's sleep I've had since moving here to this place eye-level to the tops of trees.  I'm now living three walk-up flights in the air!  Did I mention that I planned to take a small apartment while I was traveling this year, leaving my house in the hands of Joseph and Alexander, Beardy and Pinocchio, their teen-aged bearded dragon and middle-aged cat (the latter newly part of their entourage)?  After two weeks of boxing and bagging, sorting and mulling, I'm nearly all settled in, except for one corner...my workspace, a challenge anywhere, anytime.  But it's today's task, and I'm up for it.


A smaller space, to tell the truth, is an unexpected affront, unless you are a hard-core realist who freely admits to owning more than you can carry.  The summons is good, though:  whereas at home I could shift things through my fingers, believing I needed them, here in little more than half the space, it is easy to release what suddenly one sees as superfluous, sending them on to needier hands.  Perhaps I needed to come here to let go of all that extraneous stuff.  I remember the morning last week when I woke up and said, I don't need to be a museum any more.  That, too, was a letting go.

Reason not the need...says Lear.  But sometimes it's good to.

Even making the decision to leave the house to the children and settle smaller seemed, if not consciously, a necessary retreat.  This place, fortunately, feels like home, if a temporary one...generally quiet, neighbors genial, lots of light, a kitchen window which looks out to the corner of the community garden and inspires me to grow a windowsill of herbs (wouldn't this one be pretty?).


Still, how I'd love to get my hands in that dirt below.  Alas, my travels begin in five days...one chooses one's metier.  I wouldn't be home much even to water those herbs.

Someone among us, though, has planted a vegetable patch, bordered with marigolds.  And someone else has been readying his or her plot, as is clear by the new tangle of tomato hoops and hose.  It's nice to know that in a small space, too, things grow.  And that I can still have my cup and pen at hand looking out at the trees.

_________________________________________________

Cuba is next...stay tuned.

Monday, April 15, 2019

Thinking of you





Orchid Ball, by Jim Langdon

15 April, a brisk morning
                                            for Michael

Last time, decades ago

but after days of rain, overnight
wind sweeps across to change
the nature of everything

                                    I open
the kitchen door to a brash awakening
catching its refreshing candor

walk the yard, gather its leavings
count new buds on the lilacs
I transplanted before I knew
you would appear
                               and die again

Still, you grow with us
the striking black branch of dogwoods
      whitening hair glorious
against new-washed blue
between gusts, the wink of a neighbor’s 
azaleas, magenta and pink 
                    as babies’ bottoms
          barely out of their pods

I wonder what you think of us
enmeshed here in a landscape
                                    of dreams
ears tuned to every sound as ground
                                                      swells
our resolute trust 
                  ...caution to the winds!...

listening, season by season, for
                               your re-emerging song

                                                love, Mom
04 15 19
                                               

Sunday, March 24, 2019

Travel plans



Spring has sprung.  And I, I have been feeling in need of a change of scene.

I'd just about begun to luxuriate in the solitude of the house my own again (not to mention the heady energy of moving furniture to my own comforts), when I suddenly got the impulse to get up and out.  The garden, springing into bloom, came to mind first...digging, transplanting, making new beds, mulching...all in the warming air and sun.  But then I began to think much farther out than that. A change of scene came to mean real change...of mind, of scenario, of anchorage.  I suspect that something inside me has been ready for revision for longer than I could see.  Change, that constant current of my life (I might as well take the symbol ~ as my monogram), was rising to the surface again.

Not that I am complaining. Even unfortunate, drastic changes have brought some necessary self-awareness (if sometimes too late), a widening of the field and travel into new dimensions.


This time, finding myself open and willing to be somewhere else, I decided to dedicate this year to heading out to see the world, one place at a time.  To that end, I have been making a few living adjustments...like simplifying the habits of home that keep me in old, now worn out encumbrances...pulling travel guides by the dozen off the library shelves...getting on with what's next.  If that sounds familiar to you, perhaps it is because, interestingly, that sort of change seems to be in the air for lots of people I know and hear about these days.  (Some years do seem to have archetypal themes, for visible and invisible reasons.)  It's time to move on, people say.  It's time to widen our vision, they say.  It's time for something new to become the people we are inside, they say.  It's time to shake out the musty old narrow carpet we are treading, they mean, and spring onto a new one.

Mine being a flying carpet this year, it will transfer me not only from one country to another, but also from one segment of my age to another.  Next year, I will be three-quarters of a century old, and I am curious to learn, one sight at a time, what that next quarter (or at least part of it) might be going to bring.

The first episode, though, seems to be going backward, rather than forward: May will find me, if all goes according to my nearly completed plan, in Havana, where 70 years ago I found myself peeking  over the elaborate iron railing of a hotel in the middle of the old town.  Down below was the teeming, noisy, exciting street, and I was a small person from a rather restrained suburb faced suddenly with a culture electric with energy.  I have only a few memories of that trip, but that one is one of two most memorable.  I am curious to see what time has wrought of both of us.


I know all about the history of the place and its culture between those years.  I have for decades read (and taught) more than a few Cuban and Cuban-American writers and their tales of pre- and post-Castro landscape and living.  I have looked with great admiration at the colors and sensuousness of Cuban painting and am fascinated by their found-art, a pulse dancing to its musical beat.  So now we are getting at the greater reason for my travels there:  I want to study the art of the Havana scene, the people who make it, the inspirations and inceptions of their work, the materials and methods and insights.  I want to learn from them the way they turn out such vibrance from the ground up.


It's good that I have that reason because, as you might know. we have to deal with new governmental restrictions these days on who we are supposed to know and comport with.  I am glad to be in the majority of countrywomen and -men who roll their eyes and greet the world anyway.  Anyway, one of the permissions of traveling to Cuba is that one must have a good reason...and a written plan...for going to such a place to see such people, albeit neighbors only 90 miles from our shores. Apparently it isn't legally enough just to want to travel there for travel's sake. 


When I return, you will be inundated with blogs about the artists of Havana and their work, and, of course, what all that means to our ever crossing paths.  My journal will chart my way through there and into future travels.

Other sites are also on my horizon.  I never make travel plans too far in advance...every time I have, something arrives around an unseen corner to obstruct it...but later this year the South of France, with Barcelona and Messina on the side, and the British Isles, revisiting London and Scotland and newly meeting Wales...I don't know which one first.


 In 2020, Morocco, if I can manage it, and then somewhere in the Far East, Thailand or Laos or Cambodia, if my legs can hold out for those long flights.  In between there is travel among the states, too...the shore again in June, a trip at some point to Sedona, and one back to San Antonio to visit friends, Vancouver and Portland with perhaps my sister and brother-in-law to accompany me.

But that's just this week's thinking.  Who knows where and when I will actually find myself?




Tuesday, February 19, 2019

The color purple


Lately I have found myself wearing that color a lot, from raincoats to underwear.  It isn't by design, at least not conscious design, but one day last week, in West Virginia for one of a triplet of family funerals, it seemed to me an odd coincidence that, with the exception of the black suit I would wear for the service, everything in my small travel bag (which was itself purple) was some shade of it.

I suppose you could consider it one of the bruise colors, as my friend Pam's daughter once called them...red, black, blue and gray (the new black)...the standards we shop for at a certain age; easy to coordinate a outfit without more than a grab in the closet, and safe as houses for fading skin and hair, only a bright scarf needed to pull everything together and hide one's scars.

Purple, though...I wonder.  That seems the bruisiest of all.  And today, seated before the front window, watching the brave north-facing daffodils finally rearing buds into bloom despite the day's chill, I am feeling as tired and achy as a bruise would suggest.  Sturdy as I like to think myself, these two and a half months have taken a lot out of me, I'm just realizing.  One takes each day as it appears on the horizon and goes forth to meet it, accepting what comes however one can.  Shoulders raised in defense, one does what needs to be done, and gets on with it.


Now that life has changed again, I'm glad for my uncle, for whom the pain and frustration of dementia are now relieved by his passing.  Now that sympathetic company have drifted away, I feel at home once more, rattling around in my more-often-than-not silent rooms.  Now that my muscles have unclenched, I am slowly awakening to what's next.

Still, my eyes open too early in the morning, though there is no longer any reason to.  I retire early, emptied by the day, though with one thing or another on my mind I fall asleep later.  Last night it was after one o'clock, and only after I'd gotten up to make a cup of Echinacea tea.  Each morning I make my list to focus the day, and, amazingly, tick off each item...calls to make, affects to sort out, services and furniture to rearrange, appointments to show up for.  Everything else, I put on hold for when my fatigue rides away on the spring winds.


Ah, but there it is...the other side of purple...not the bruise but the promise.  Look here at my Valentine's gift from Joseph and Alexander, a pot of the first flowers up in the returning warmth, and the rich bloom on the hellebore, a gift from my neighbors Betsy and Vern.


Even the pure white roses my aunt and cousins sent for our memorial gathering were cushioned in purple.


And here, the gray-purple of the first show of light.

The chill in the air may pretend to a flurry of snow tomorrow to spite yesterday's warmth, but it's a facetious swipe no one really believes in.  I don't.  Purple may be the transition between lives as well as seasons.  It's good to know.

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

Birthdays


Today (the day I write this) is Alexander's birthday; he's six.  And I am here to tell you that there is a huge difference between being five (5) and being six (6).  He's taller in body, yes, but also in stature of mind and attitude.   Not something I would expect so practically overnight, though now that I think about it, I could see bits of it coming, a word here, a shrug there.  He doesn't like to be called cute or handsome or tootsie pie (well, I will give him that...); he is Alexander, plain and dignified.


A curious, thinking boy, he is also at work on something all the time, as he always did--generating an idea a minute, building towers and machines and camps, wrapping yarn around chair legs for a trap, hiding under tables and in bushes so that he can spring out (and not a second too soon) Surprise!  Singing to himself, making up jokes and games (he has his own rules for backgammon, for example, quite complicated and changing every minute).  He still likes the making part of cooking and baking, moreso these days for someone specific...egg salad for his mom or dad, pumpkin chocolate chip muffins (without pumpkin, he insists) for his great-great uncle.  He likes learning his numbers and letters, but on paper his favorite are lists he can check off and measurements he can chart (and arguments about such which he can win); there is the theoretical and there is the practical, and there is no question about the one in which he finds his strength.

He loves that he is now in the six-year-olds clay class, not the beginners in which some are only four (4) years old, for heaven's sake, and proud of being in the Super Boys gymnastics group instead of the mixed group with only two boys and lots of little girls in specially selected gym outfits (with glitter, if you please), hopping and flipping around them and doing splits.  He still loves his bearded dragon, Beardie, but you can see him moving into a little different relationship to him now that he is older...more I-you then I-we.  With toys he is as excited as ever with things that run on batteries, race around the house or climb to the moon.  He has begun to hanker after the games his older cousins play.  "When I am seven," he ponders, "what day will it be?"


But there is the Alexander that stays the same, too...his affection, his humor, his energy--goodness! what energy!--and his need to be his own person and do his own things (that is, do things his own way).

Mostly he is concerned that things should stay the same, even while he grows beyond it.  There he inherits the child's greatest wish:  to keep the world safely around him, while he takes his own good time wandering in it.

↠↠↠

Interestingly, only a day later I turn 74, and some of those child's traits appear to belong to me, too, though in more questioning form.  You can forget the energy...that, I am afraid, has long dissipated.  But I watch Alexander's idea-a-minute, and have to smile.  "There is nothing you like better than a project," my husband used to say, not without a hint of exasperation.  And though I have long given up acrobatics, which I was pretty good at once upon a time, I like clay, too, the way it forms and reforms under your fingers, the way its smooth surface can turn into any shape you wish.  I am attracted far more to the used and discarded than I am to the new...there is so much more to invent with them.  So I am an artist, in that way, and so is my young grandson.  Alexander and I can turn anything into anything else in pretty much the same minute. 


Like Alexander, I am a person who chases theory into the practical.  I am going to admit here, after all these years, that during my time teaching, I had little use for writing postulatory articles on minute subjects I didn't think the world especially needed to have to read or wasted paper on, despite the fact that it seemed to be the way to the heart of an academic career. 

You are hearing this from a person who has used writing as her best form of communication all her life...a bookworm, a wordsmith, a close listener to the tales of others.  Papers at conferences?  Ok, but only to share a conversation with a group of people present and already interested, and then we would all go out to dinner and then go home and back to teaching and doing something about something.  Whatever the rules are, I too prefer to do things my own way.  (Some people might call that stubborn; Alexander and I just ignore them.)

There is another side to that trait:  a woman I once worked with (Colleen something I can't bring up now, though I remember her as if she were sitting right here smirking at me, imposing, acerbically funny, caring, and fun to be with) once said to me on greeting, "Ah, Rachel...still trying to save the world?"  It took me back for a minute, but then it set me forward, too.

And yet another:  the need for belonging, which in funny ways contradicts my great need for solitude, for having regular space around me to think and not think.  The pleasure in friends (and that includes family), both long-time and nearby, and in their correspondence or in sharing walks or spontaneous visits during which we can catch up with each other, in sharing holiday tables.  Alexander and I like cooking for people; we like finding their pleasure in being so served.  Likewise, my happiness in finding myself in a neighborhood as neighborly as ours comes from the same source.  Further than that is my tendency to be the gatherer of information about who is where and doing what...not unlike Alexander who knows where every single child in his class is on the playground at any moment. It can lead to one more trait fortunately now dropped from use: to find myself in charge of whatever organization I volunteer for.

So on these birthdays, I celebrate, gratefully, that Alexander and I are part of each other's everyday theoretical and practical working world.


Happy Birthday, dear boy (if you will allow me the dear just this once), who, despite my climbing years, gives my life one more soupḉon of youth.



Wednesday, December 26, 2018

A winter morning



The sun is not yet above the ridge of houses across the street from me, but the signs are there...pale pink streaks the white sky behind the complicated network of leafless trees, like the fractures of lead in Tudor stained glass.


The paleness of the morning is the season's signature, and shed of holiday clutter, we, too, feel pale.  Coming home yesterday afternoon from Angie and Jim's ebullient, warm Christmas brunch on the farm, that paleness had already begun to return to the sky from the blue of the morning, the day tiring early, I suppose.  It made the huge red poinsettia, a marvelous gift from the faraway Baers, seem to stand out further in the front window.


Right now, even the sun behind Taylor and Gina's tall oak (all the trees hereabouts are tall...oaks, maples, pines, tulip poplar--the giant behind my house--and sweet gum) hides a pallid face.  It will be a nice day, not quite chilly and mostly sun, I know from the weather forecast, but the squirrels and birds seem to have had other information and run around picking, pecking whatever they can find, preparing for something.  I wonder what they know.


We are alone today, my uncle and I, the holidays having diverted our caregivers.  He is still asleep after a whole night of breathing roughly, bouts of coughing, long periods of apnea.  Exhausted from thirty-three hours of being awake and jumpy inside the strange plane of his mind, he has hardly moved under his tweed and wool covers since 7 last night.  These are upside-down days of increasing dementia, so each day brings its own scenario. (In the photo above, dressed for Christmas, he tried to take apart his walker to figure out what it is.) Last night, I camped out near his room so that I could jump up before he tried to raise himself on his crumbling legs, but though I kept as awake as I could I heard nor saw any reason for me to rise, either.


I also wonder if winter enervates minds struggling with the mental and physical flips and slips aging brings.  Why not?  All nature goes underground, in its own ways, and we in cooler climates do the same.  Huddled into sweaters, coats, hats, we take on the skin of another self, sort of molting in reverse.  Born in winter, though in a tropical clime, I have never been much of a cold-weather person.  And yet winter, as I look from the inside out, has its charms.  That low-angle sun skirts the shrubs, topping them with white slight this time of day.  If there is frost, or fog, its glitter enlivens the ordinarily dull landscape.  The elianthus, not our favorite green, shows its prettiest white flower this season.  The hellebore has bloomed early but right on time to make us smile.  And the one flower, the anomaly of my yard, a winter-blooming azalea, braving dullness, stands down snow or sun.


And I?  The inside more than outside draws me.  I feel myself succumb to dullness, too, hunkering  like the roots underground for brighter inspiration. Sometime soon I will return to my dangling vine and gem project, but not today, though its crystals would certainly dance on the worktable in this winter light.  (I am having a technical problem with it, but one morning, I am sure, I will wake up from a dream, like Newton, and solve it.)



I look to other pursuits...a gift of lovely pears I poached with ginger, and some scarves Alexander asked me to knit for his cousins, aunt and other grandmother he was about to visit on a holiday trip...he wants to do it himself, but he hasn't quite got the hang of knitting; perhaps because I'm right -handed and he's a lefty, it's hard for us to figure out together.  White I knitted, though, he painted and made some pots from clay for them.  He's never at loss, inside or out, for something to do.


A new year to you all of peace, kindness, calm...winter's dream we wait hopeful to come true.